Indian traffic: A satirical take by keen observers

The northeastern states have some semblances of good traffic sense, including strict lane discipline, which is lacking elsewhere.

BHPian anjan_c2007 recently shared this with other enthusiasts.

This thread is dedicated to our own experiences while driving through our roads over the years or decades, to record our encounters with anything and everything with satirical and witty interpretations. These often make a mockery of one or more conventions, pragmatic practices, extant rules and laws which we observe almost on a daily basis. The situational irony that we encounter, interpreted and coupled with our wit and sarcasm would make interesting reading.

It's the same everywhere - north, south, east or west. The northeastern states have some semblances of good traffic sense, including strict lane discipline, which is lacking elsewhere. A few places in the north, south, east and west could be exceptions, but things are the largely the same everywhere.

Lane discipline in Shillong, Meghalaya

To start with :-

In a location, that was a crowded junction in a city without traffic signals and also without cops on duty, about 20-25 cars and about 20 two wheelers from all directions created a traffic jam when someone says, "even huge herds of cattle from different directions congregate at places, but move ahead with mutual understating and consent to have each one’s right of way".

When you emerge from a crowded road and just engage the overdrive of your car stepping on the gas, you will suddenly, within seconds, find some biker from somewhere emerging coming too close to your car.

When you overtake umpteen vehicles on a six lane highway and just emerge onto an assumedly, clear stretch, very soon you'll find a tanker on the right lane, an over loaded truck on the lane second from right, and a Tata Ace on the extreme left lane all moving at conservative speeds of about 50 kmph.

During the peak of summer your car AC conks off and you find your trusted AC technician closing shop indefinitely for some days to attend a marriage ceremony. During summers, many marriages are solemnised.

Here's what BHPian jigar1791@gmail had to say on the matter:

What a start to the weekend, where we can pen down our frustration, merrily assuming we can enjoy the weekend with an upcoming drive..only to encounter :

1. Buses hogging 1.5 lanes on the highway either to pickup/drop pax from bus-stops/pickup points

2. 2-wheelers/autos coming on the wrong side, and asking you to give them the right of way, you begin to question yourself whether you're in the right direction or otherwise

3. HCVs hauling at 40-45 kph on the 1st lane, and entire holding up a significant count of faster vehicles behind them, those vehicles trying hard to overtake the HCV, creating a bee formation, potentially endangering a larger group with a quick, yet dangerous overtake attempt

And the list could go on and on ..

But, the biggest one that I'd like to highlight is the fact that I have become more calmer and relaxed when on the road. The virtue of forgiveness, without the other one even asking for it.

And that calmness has sort of creeped in my personal/social interactions as well

If I can mind my own business and maintain my calm with multiple morons on the road whom I don't know, I should be equally patient when I'm around with my known ones

Here's what BHPian pranavt had to say on the matter:

Scenario: You want to take a left turn. Your line is (A). The neanderthal heading in the opposite direction (B), a distant cousin of *insert your favourite racer*, decides that they must hit the apex of the corner while taking their racing line. The neanderthal could be in a car, or on a bike, or driving a 3-wheeler, or riding an animal. Honking at them only offends them. They mutter abuses at you while navigating their turn.

Take a look at the attached picture.

Here's what BHPian alphamike1612 had to say on the matter:

The biggest peeve is the use of high beam inside well lit city roads.

Activa users I'm looking at you for your bright white lights.

Most of my friends and a few in my family have this bad habit.

Infact a relative of mine always leaves the beam on high. He wears glasses too and when I ask him if it doesn't bother his eyes when others do the same, he replies "It does, but I want to see the road better, anyway they also do it." Mind you he's a professional.

When I get in, I ask him to change the beam to low, 10 minutes later, the blue Hi Beam light magically turns on in the dash again.

I'm exasperated at this and if I keep pointing it out, I'm looked at like I'm some rule Nazi.

A friend of mine didn't know that her scooter was on high beam or that her scooter had 2 light modes, when I pointed it out to her, she asked me what it was.

Mind you, this is another professional and one who's really good at it

Here's what BHPian alpha1 had to say on the matter:

How about the city commuter buses weaving in and out of the road lanes doing a snake dance?

While cruising they will hog the right most lane and trudge either slowly or recklessly fast.

When the bus stop is nearing, they will veer towards the left and occupy 1.5 lanes (0.5 lane actually occupied by the passengers at the bus stop, thinking that they can out compete those who are within the premises of the bus stop). Then as soon as the bus starts, it will move towards right cutting everyone off behind it ... and so it goes on. A snaky wavy sinusoidal motion on the road.

Here's what BHPian BlackBeard had to say on the matter:

Trucks, buses and even some cars driving on the extreme right (overtaking lane) on roads indicate left but do not change lanes when they see a faster vehicle attempting to overtake them.

I have seen the same with trucks, buses and some cars parked on the extreme left lane stopped and indicating to the right!

As ridiculous as it may sound but its a "desi ingenuity".

Their way of informing that overtake from the indicated side!

Read BHPian comments for more insights and information.