[RajaTaurus]

Gansan, This should also feature in 'offical jokes thread' I guess.

[aargee]

@Gansan Sir - that was too much & very funny incident; you guys could've walked for dinner rather than waiting at the parking lot so as to save time & kill your hunger.

[Gansan]

@RajaTaurus
It should, except this was a real life incident!

@aargee
The eatery was about 1.5 KM away from the venue, en route to our township which was about 10 KM away, we would have walked otherwise. Moreover since it was already 9.30 PM the gates to the venue would have been locked by the time we returned.

When I narrated this incident at the office the next day, it spawned many "Ramasamy" jokes! An example:

Mr.Ramaswamy goes to a movie with his wife and kid. During the interval he goes out alone for a coffee and smoke, and in his hurry forgets his row/seat no., but just makes a note that a fellow in the seat immediately in front of his is wearing a turban. By the time he returns the lights are dimmed and the show has re-commenced, and to make matters worse the fellow has also removed his turban! How will Ramaswamy find his seat?!

BTW I am happy to announce that thanks to my previous post, I have made contact with a former colleague of mine, bhpian RajaTaurus. Sir, you might also remember this Ramaswamy - have sent you a PM about him.

[KRRaj]

Hilarious Gansan and at the Ramasamy Jokes also. So finally you and Ramasamy waited till all the scooters were taken out?

[Gansan]

Originally Posted by KRRaj

Hilarious Gansan and at the Ramasamy Jokes also. So finally you and Ramasamy waited till all the scooters were taken out?

What else to do, of course we did! Because those days there was not much color choice in Lambretta scooters-about half a dozen colors at the most. It would have attracted unwanted attention had we gone about trying to open one green scooter after another, and there were many of them.

[DRIV3R]

Originally Posted by aargee

I hope this incident will make you atleast a smile that happened sometimes during January this year. I was waiting in the right most lane to take a right turn in my car along with my Son. When ensured I'm not disrupting the traffic, I started moving my car & boom from somewhere a Pulsar jumped in & rammed on to my left tyre, his bike on the front bumper & he fell down. I parked my car to the adjourning footpath, switched off the car, left my son in & kept the glass half opened. Meanwhile this biker gets up & comes to me charging up & tells me that I haven't seen the bike coming & I was careless & he was coming only in 40. I calmly tell him that I'm calling the cops & let them decide what happened; picked up my cell phone & called. Here's the conversation...
Me: Good evening sir
Other side(Os): Tell me da
Me: Sir, are you around Anna Nagar or outside
Os: I'm in Salem, tell me da
Me: Yes, sir, some problem around, can you come down here?
Os: Hey, I'm in Salem man, how can I come to Chennai
Me: Yes, sir at Anna Nagar 13th main road
Os: Hey man, I'm your friend Ramesh
Me: Yes sir, I know
Os: Did you call me by mistake?
Me: No sir
Os: Then what do you want?
Me: Ok, sir, pls come, we will be waiting
Os: Are you all right?
Me: Yes sir, the bike number is TN....
Os: I didn't understand. What's going on? What is that bike number?
Me: Ok sir. Thanks & phone call disconnected.
Now I tell this biker that we wait here & the CI is coming. Now this guy is terrified & says, "you're all big shots & can do whatever you want. Pls let me go sir, I agree its my mistake & this is my relative's bike". After 20 more minutes of plead & forgiveness, I left home with Rs 380; a week later this money was donated to a temple.

Instead you could have just kept the phone in your ear and made the act. (Of course, the phone should be in silent mode) You would have saved your call cost, and your friend would not have thought what went wrong with you!

[MX6]

Originally Posted by DRIV3R

Instead you could have just kept the phone in your ear and made the act. (Of course, the phone should be in silent mode) You would have saved your call cost, and your friend would not have thought what went wrong with you!

Not all people are dumb like the biker. You try that trick and the biker demands your phone to talk to the CI, you can wriggle out atleast if your friend catches the ploy quickly and speaks back as CI.
Worst scenario would be when the biker knows another CI and he calls up too (who happens to be a real CI).

[aargee]

Originally Posted by MX6

Not all people are dumb like the biker. You try that trick and the biker demands your phone to talk to the CI, you can wriggle out atleast if your friend catches the ploy quickly and speaks back as CI.
Worst scenario would be when the biker knows another CI and he calls up too (who happens to be a real CI).

Well MX6, I'd cut the long story short in the post. I did call up another friend of mine who deals with cops & has a hard voice. I spoke to him little friendly & gave the phone to the biker & said, "speak with SI carefully". My friend gave the biker what it takes to give him hard & that's how he handed over the money to me.

Well I wouldn't get bothered much if the biker asks me to speak even with a SP; it would've been a nightmare if he agreed to come along with me to the traffic investigation dept.

[DevilsCry]

I know how gas cylinder wallahs park their motorcycles using the cylinders as a stand. But this guy's style is just amazing



No comments about the pic below!

[<Badguy>]

This incident happened to one of my tuition teacher when I was in class 8 or 9. Now this teacher was one of those pot bellied guy who drives his LML with much pride and boast about it ride comfort to students. To give you picture of him you can directly visualize Amole Gupta of Stanley Ka dubba.
This guy was in particular fond of chewing betel leaf (Paan) and always took two betel leaves at a time.

One evening this guy came to teach us with a plaster on his leg and we were surprised how that happened. He explained that he was driving on his LML and on ascending the flyover in town he realized that brakes have failed for the scooter. He switched off the engine and being a lazy fellow he thought that he will sit on scooter and let it roll down from the flyover.

On approaching the end of flyover he realized that he has attain a much higher speed than anticipated and he tried to stop the scooter by putting his leg on the rear of auto rickshaw which has stopped near the road. The impact was such that he had a broken leg.

We were sorry for his state and though how unlucky the incident was then suddenly one of the student raised his hand and asked

"Sir you could have shouted to people near you that brakes have failed and people would have given you empty stretch as the place near flyover is usually not crowded and there must have not been enough people at that time"

To this he replied : "Yes I thought of doing this on first hand but then 'muuh mein paan tha naa'"

We guys were having simply

[condor]

Originally Posted by DevilsCry

No comments about the pic below!

@DevilsCry, that's a pic of a goods auto with a flat front tyre. What's funny (if it is something else, I am missing it).

[sohail99]

^Good one!

Here's one of mine -

During my internship, we were at the fatehpur beri PHC, distributing condoms under national aids control programme at the antenatal clinic, when one woman who we gave the condom to, asked "How do I have to take this medicine, in the morning and evening?"

We had a hearty laugh in the bus while we were coming back from there!

[DevilsCry]

Originally Posted by condor

@DevilsCry, that's a pic of a goods auto with a flat front tyre. What's funny (if it is something else, I am missing it).

I don't know exactly how auto's are jacked up. I just found it funny to see it so delicately balanced on a couple of bricks. May be it is actually normal.

[condor]

@DevilsCry, there's a lot of jugaad & local practices that people follow to get work like that done. It's all very normal to us (India), though a foreigner may find it funny.

[Oxy]

Well this happened to me today. Not funny to me because I was at the receiving end.

I had joined a very critical project in my company a couple of months ago. Since then, I am into defect fixing. Apparently, all defects assigned to me over these two months were either not replicable or did not require a fix.

We use a tool called JIRA to update the status against each defect, putting screenshots of our test efforts wherever required.

Today my PM calls me in. This is how the conversation went:

PM: You have not made any progress since you joined the project.

Me: Huh? I have about three defects pending, and I have been assigned about 30 till date.

PM: (Showing his fancy pie charts and reports on his laptop) Look at this, where is your name in this report?

Me: I have no clue, what is this report?

PM: This is the list of issues fixed by each resource till date. You haven't fixed any.

Me: That's just not possible. As I said, I am done with about 27 of them.

PM: Show me the code changes. What have you fixed?

Me: There have not been many code change for the defects assigned to me till date, barring a couple of issues which are under review currently. I have tested and attached relevent screenshots on JIRA against each issue I have been working on.

PM: So you have not made any progress at all. If I show this report to the Director, you will be fired.

I have no clue how to deal with nutcases like these.