[Malyaj]

Originally Posted by woodstock3001

Rather very late to post, but thank you Malyaj for sharing. I hope no one go through this in early 40s, as that's the time at least i will be thinking of kids further education, savings etc etc.

All the points listed by you are honest and hold extreme value. Going to share with close friends for sure so that if not all points, at least we can incorporate 1 or 2 points from you.

Like my signatures say - This too shall pass, I'm sure you will overcome this. All the best for future commitments.

Thanks! Glad you found it useful

[rhsakarp]

@Malyaj, thanks for sharing ! Very useful insights and actionable items.
Wish you the very best !!

[Rajjay]

Very practical and morale boosting post. Thanks for sharing.

[sheelRP]

Beautiful and honest sharing of experiences . Thanks to each one of you for coming out winners and inspiring others as well.

[fawad0222]

Originally Posted by S2K

I have a few questions regarding this. More like anticipatory advices.

Mods I believe answers to the above query deserve an independent thread in itself as it would help the people who are about to or have just started their career and an independent life.

Thanks Malyaj for coming out with an honest and sincere update on your work-life situation at the moment.

Having reached the age fifty, I have had my own personal ups and downs in life and it would cease only when I cease to exist any more. And this has brought my own personal learnings as well.

First, always have something to look forward to( to do), for next day before one goes to sleep.Work and retirement has no fixed boundaries, whatever rules are there, are man made creations. Be engaged in some productive work for always.

Though its a cliche but nevertheless true that time never remains constant. It is bound to change and so does your situation. If its bad currently it would surely improve provided one keeps patience and remains proactive.On the other hand the reverse is also true that good times are not going to last indefinitely therefore one must plan for such an eventuality.

Now what I am going to write is very important and is yet to be turned into a well tuned common saying. life is not one single monolith but is composed of many parts and has many facets, which are to a large extent independent of each other. And yet each of therm are important for a good life as a whole.I see them as different types of health of an individual like physical, mental , spiritual, social, career, financial health and so on. It is very important to focus on them individually instead of just ambling on life which it would if not attempted consciously. It is very likely that at any point of time almost all of us would be having some issues touching some aspects of our life but not all. Here it is important to recognize that all is not lost and only one or two aspects of our existence has hit a turbulence and we must keep on maintaining the remaining parts diligently while patiently trying to overcome the affected one.

One day, i shall try to write my own personal experiences when I gather enough courage and gumption, till then, compartmentalize your life and work, maintain and enjoy each of them.

regards

[sukhbirST]

We seldom give honest feedback on our own life and I thank you for being so clear, candid and truthful. Hope your points motivate many who may not be so brave and bold in life. Liked your end comments - You need to keep digging a deep well at one place instead of digging many shallow ones. All the best and do well. I always keep telling my juniors that leave and money should be saved. In the end only these will come to your rescue. One should be glad that leave and money is left behind and must thank God that there was no emergency in life to use them. By the way, no of thanks is testimony to your fighting spirit.

[womanonwheels]

Thank you for sharing. this is inspiring.

I know people from my parent's generation who lived on one salary and raised many kids. Or retired and lived on their savings and investment for many years. Today I see couples killing themselves making a living and finding it difficult to manage their lives with single or no child. A large part of this problem is the consumerism that is shoved in our faces via social media. there are apps who are forever pushing notifications on deals and offers. Markets are crowded with packages for everything from daily needs to custom made festival hampers. you don't need to lift a finger or drive to buy stuff. You are forever reminded you need the latest Nike sneaker or the new iPhone to be in the cool kids club. Cooking is no longer cool, swiggy and zomato are around. No need to bake cakes or make sweets for occasions. Everything is available on apps and then we have more apps where we can post selfies bragging about the things we bought on other apps.

[V.Narayan]

Originally Posted by womanonwheels

Thank you for sharing. this is inspiring.

I know people from my parent's generation who lived on one salary and raised many kids. Or retired and lived on their savings and investment for many years. Today I see couples killing themselves making a living and finding it difficult to manage their lives with single or no child. A large part of this problem is the consumerism that is shoved in our faces via social media. there are apps who are forever pushing notifications on deals and offers. Markets are crowded with packages for everything from daily needs to custom made festival hampers. you don't need to lift a finger or drive to buy stuff. You are forever reminded you need the latest Nike sneaker or the new iPhone to be in the cool kids club. Cooking is no longer cool, swiggy and zomato are around. No need to bake cakes or make sweets for occasions. Everything is available on apps and then we have more apps where we can post selfies bragging about the things we bought on other apps.

A very sensible post. You should post more often. As I qualify almost to be a part of the previous generation for most BHPIans, the fact is we built homes and raised families and funded top dog education for our kids and still had savings to live comfortably in old age because we saved- that dreaded four letter S word - Savings. While the middle and lower middle classes in India continue to save the way your parent's generation did the upper middle classes of people below 40 years of age seem to have a significantly higher propensity to spend*. Don't imitate the Americans - the individual American and the American Govt borrow from the rest of the world to fund their daily expenditures. Not a sustainable model. In a perverse way the covid19 had one salutary effect - it made the current generation of upwardly mobile Indians realize that the good times are never a given even if a phase lasts 20 years. How many shirts does one really need?

*to illustrate a personal example. My eldest child has only now started saving and took some advice from me on what, where, how. I'm glad he has finally started. I resisted the temptation of wagging my finger and telling him that at his age I had bought my first house on a real income several times lower!

[adisan]

... the upper middle classes of people below 40 years of age seem to have a significantly higher propensity to spend*.

Among today's middle-aged people, those who saw life before the economic liberalization and the IT boom seem to have retained the habit of savings. Those were the times when owning a house before retirement was the ultimate dream for many, but for some it remained unfulfilled despite working hard and saving towards it. Today, those who sensibly handle their income are able to own a house in their early thirties.

For some people, expenses always seem to stretch with their increasing income. Unfortunately, the lessons are being learnt the hard way during the economic recessions and pandemics.

[womanonwheels]

Originally Posted by V.Narayan

A very sensible post. You should post more often. As I qualify almost to be a part of the previous generation for most BHPIans, the fact is we built homes and raised families and funded top dog education for our kids and still had savings to live comfortably in old age because we saved- that dreaded four letter S word - Savings. While the middle and lower middle classes in India continue to save the way your parent's generation did the upper middle classes of people below 40 years of age seem to have a significantly higher propensity to spend*. Don't imitate the Americans - the individual American and the American Govt borrow from the rest of the world to fund their daily expenditures. Not a sustainable model. In a perverse way the covid19 had one salutary effect - it made the current generation of upwardly mobile Indians realize that the good times are never a given even if a phase lasts 20 years. How many shirts does one really need?

*to illustrate a personal example. My eldest child has only now started saving and took some advice from me on what, where, how. I'm glad he has finally started. I resisted the temptation of wagging my finger and telling him that at his age I had bought my first house on a real income several times lower!

Thank you for your feedback - I cant agree more!. I had to shift cities due to a role change and the I was flummoxed by the number of clothes and kitchen tools I owned. I may have to move again but the thought of going through the hassle of having to move/unpack those giant 95 boxes of stuff I own is scary. I am trying to become a minimalist and to get rid of unwanted stuff. The fact that OLX today is filled with fraudsters and people who wish to use it as Tinder is another problem altogether. I would rather give stuff away to friends of charities rather than deal with nonsensical queries and request to share phone numbers and send pics where I am wearing the said clothes Like seriously!!

[am1m]

Originally Posted by womanonwheels

...and request to share phone numbers and send pics where I am wearing the said clothes Like seriously!!

Oh my god, that's ridiculous! Sad state of affairs really.

Originally Posted by womanonwheels

I had to shift cities due to a role change and the I was flummoxed by the number of clothes and kitchen tools I owned.

Yep, my wife and I realized this too. Thanks to remote working at both our jobs, we've been working from a few different locations for the past 2 years. Surprising how we've managed with just whatever we can cart around in a small car. How we can live happy at places 1/4th the size of our home back in Bangalore and manage without so many online services/city-type entertainment. Realized how much unnecessary stuff we had back home. Every time we head back, we give away some of our stuff, especially clothes.

[Emvi]

@womanonwheels, @V.Narayan, @adisan
Thank you for bringing this up. I have a few points to add, excuse me if my thoughts are not exactly pertinent to the thread.

There are people who just take loans for fun and when the time of repayment comes, they are mostly on the run. Recently I came across a person who bought an iPhone costing close to 100 grand whose monthly salary is about 10 grand per month or thereabouts. I don't want to be too critical about the guy but this certainly left me stunned. There are far too many easy loans available for purchasing smartphones these days!

A few such examples-




I am associated with one of the co-operative financial institutions in my place. It is absolutely startling that a few people take loans just because they are eligible or for inconsequential reasons. The institution provides loans under various headers viz.- agricultural and non-agricultural loan, personal loan, jewel loan, vehicle purchase loan, housing loan. There are people who take loan under one header just to repay some other loan.
Can it crazier than this? Well it can!

I know a few people who are happy to donate relatively large sums of money in the name of charity, but the same people find it difficult when it comes to loan repayment. Don't get me wrong, I am not against charity. But the true intention of such charities is plain show-off, nothing more. Just because their names get published in local newspapers, the generous donations towards "social cause" are made!

People somehow manage to keep the loans "active" and stay afloat usually. Things go wrong and have gone wrong during the pandemic year or even before that due to unforeseen upheavals in earnings. What do such borrowers do? Blame the institution, the government, and for that matter, each and everyone except themselves.

When saving and judicious spending is never in the mind and WANTS take precedence over NEEDS, you are never too far away from trouble.

[Red Liner]

Originally Posted by V.Narayan

How many shirts does one really need?

Two - one to wash and dry, while you wear the other one.

Thats how I survived for 2 months on a motorcycle trip

[alpha1]

Originally Posted by V.Narayan

the upper middle classes of people below 40 years of age seem to have a significantly higher propensity to spend*. Don't imitate the Americans - the individual American and the American Govt borrow from the rest of the world to fund their daily expenditures. Not a sustainable model. In a perverse way the covid19 had one salutary effect - it made the current generation of upwardly mobile Indians realize that the good times are never a given even if a phase lasts 20 years. How many shirts does one really need?

A counter-point that I heard from one close friend (who is also a colleague and Director at MNC): demand creates supply. He spends more so that he is "compelled" to work/achieve more and earn more.

Keeps the cogs of economy spinning ever faster.

Add some factors like FOMO (fear of missing out) and the final nail against which no one can argue - YOLO (you only live once).

[Sheel]

@Malyaj - How is it going at your end buddy?

Originally Posted by alpha1

A counter-point that I heard from one close friend (who is also a colleague and Director at MNC): demand creates supply. He spends more so that he is "compelled" to work/achieve more and earn more.

Keeps the cogs of economy spinning ever faster.

Add some factors like FOMO (fear of missing out) and the final nail against which no one can argue - YOLO (you only live once).

I hope instead of splurging (his money his choice and I fully respect that, I am just humbly putting my POV) it would be better to do some more charity, will help a lot of people.

In FOMO & YOLO, most of us are paying for imported goods, will help economy, no two ways, but in charity, I think it will help the small scale industries / startups while boosting the economy.

Just my POV .