This post is not about any questionable organizations. This is case of two genuine NGOs i have been making donations to and something something that is burdening my mind for the last few days.
I was not able to find an appropriate thread to post this. But i have been losing sleep over this and had to vent it out to someone and i am posting here. If there is another appropriate thread where this belongs, please help push this to that thread.
During the pandemic, i have been thinking of how privileged i am in getting a salary every month while lots of people suffer. We all did our bit in donations to the many funds either through our organizations or directly as well.
Somewhere in between, I was first contacted by a charitable organization,
Child Help Foundation.. They were asking donations for treatment of some children. I made a few donations. I realized i should have checked at least once before making donations. I did a check in
our forum (Fake / Fraud / Scam Calls) if it was legit or a scam. Ever since then every month i have been doing monthly donations to this organization.
I have not maintained habit of saving the contact from their end and usually as soon as the call or link comes, i make the donation. I had not bothered to remember the name of the contact at their end as well. This has led to few of the following situations. Nothing wrong or illegal. But somehow i feel bad.
In between i got a call from someone and i assumed i had got from the same organization. (Remember i am dumb enough not to bother to remember the name or number of the caller anytime). I realised in the payment page that i had the caller was from another organization.
Child Support Foundation. Seemed legit and i ended up making donation to them as well.
Now i know i have no right to feel morally superior for making donations as this. I also get tax waiver certificates for each of these donations.
Now comes an event that left a sour taste for me. Not through anybody's fault but mine alone. November 29th i get a call from someone from Child help foundation and this being the original NGO i had checked in this forum as well. I heard out. I was made to understand that the fees for the treatment for a kid was to be paid immediately the same day and it was urgent. So i made the payment immediately. December 1st i get a call from a familiar voice from the same organization and asking for the same kid. This time the donation i made was fresh in my memory and i ask why the bill which was urgent was not paid till now. Yes i do realize that it is a struggle for people to collect the amount and chances are my small donation would not have been enough to pay the bills. But here i was acting high and mighty that i made donation to the kid considering it was urgent and i am getting a duplicate request for the same kid within two days. The caller now is the one who usually handles all my previous transactions, checks my receipt and realizes one of her colleagues had called me on Nov 29th instead of her and informs me to make payments only if i get call from her. Now i am not a very emotionally sound guy and i ask her if all this is actually for the kids or is it to meet monthly targets. (I actually typed this message out in anger, again i realize these volunteers struggle a whole lot to make these collections). Finally i decide to save this number and now i am so guarded before making any donations at all.
I have been getting call from Child Support foundation for the past few days for a treatment amount which is even lesser than what i usually donate. But my mind is so much on the defensive now, that i am hesitating to make the payment.
I was really happy to set apart this small amount for something good. I am not happy with the current mind space that i am now feeling so guarded against making these payments. I have been expressing these doubts to the the people who call about the donations and they have been understanding enough. I am not sure how to get out of these self doubts. I am looking for some external motivation to push me out of this mind space (as internal factors have not kicked me out yet).
Also if i may ask something of this forum. Does anybody out of Bangalore have experience with these NGOs. Has anybody else interacted with them and/or made donations.
I have no affiliations with either of these organizations and am not promoting them here. The only link i have is that i have been making some monthly donations to them.