Team-BHP - The Official Joke thread

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Geez!!
Apologies, travelwriter.

Quote:

Originally Posted by selfdrive (Post 2604943)

Mine has a further twist.
My wife agrees that I am wrong and then I say sorry. :Frustrati

You, sir, are a terrestrial!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by mayankk (Post 2604945)

what ???
another one?

Someone's gotta get in touch with SETI or nasa or something!!
these guys are definitely not from this planet!!!
:D

You are not happily married, right?

Quote:

Originally Posted by bluevolt (Post 2604879)

Why Hindu Law does not permit Second Marriage...???

Answer- Indian Constitution-Article 20(2)-says No man can be punished twice for same offence. :)

@the emboldened bit,I think that the term Double Jeopardy can be/is used instead.
:OT:-
If I had remembered this during my exams,I would have passed my "Constitution Of India and Professional Ethics" subjectstupid:

Quote:

Originally Posted by selfdrive (Post 2604899)

Happy anniversary buddy!
I am sure you would have got more silence than the 2 mins you asked for :eek:

Its nice of you to report your safety and well being (for now) by typing this post out :thumbs up
Also hope that you didnt go ahead and give reasons in detail, in whose honour/ remembrance the 2 mins silence etc.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Swanand Inamdar (Post 2604738)

Its my wedding anniversary today.
My wife asked me as to what gift would I like on this day?

I nonchalently answered - "2 mins of silence".

Didnt quite understand the part where, I am supposed to end up in the living room tonight.

P.S: All this is actually true.

I on behalf of all teambhp fellow members am constantly praying for the safety, security and well being of Mr Swanand ever since I read his post.Though I don't know him personally, that team spirit or better teambhp spirit.Happy Anniversary Swanandji. :thumbs up

Surprising. We have quite a few henpecked husbands around here. Even more surprising is that they choose to type out their wo[e|w]s.

Reminds me of the story about the King asking a crowd to split into two - one side for those who obey their wives; and the other for those who refuse to obey their b[i|e}tter halves. There was only one guy on the latter side. The king asked him for details, and he replied - "my wife asked me not to disclose the truth"!!!

now that we are discussing wives, some dialogs that get repeated quite often.

her: will you marry again if i died?
I: I have tried it once, take a guess.

her: do you love me?
I: I answered it y'day, do you want the answer to change? I can, just let me know.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Swanand Inamdar (Post 2604738)

I am assuming it's silent in the living room, unless you turn on the TV or something.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mukeshgoel (Post 2605850)

Only Two Things Change A Woman's Mood:
1. I Love You!
2. 50% Discount!
:-)

Mukesh you might hear it from Condor
CONDOR where are you??

Jus to change the mood perspective -
* 1 thing that will change a woman's mood - Your "I love you at 50% discount" rl:

80-year-old man to Doctor : My 20-year-old wife is pregnant.

Doctor : Listen to this story. A hunter goes to the jungle. In a hurry, he takes his umbrella instead of his gun. In the jungle he suddenly comes face to face with a lion. He pulls the handle of his umbrella and fires. The lion dies.

Old Man : Impossible! Someone else must have fired a gun!

Doctor : That is exactly my point! :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scarlet_Rider (Post 2606582)

Artillery problems in a nutshell!
Here is a Marathi poster affixed by someone below the doorbell.

It reads " The voters are asleep during noons. Do not ring the bell. Or else you won't get the vote. And do not bother, we will cast our votes in your favour."