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yeah, now we know where Iran is - in Australia!! :D

With apprehensions of getting condored, here I go :D

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Source: Wikipedia

This was on Facebook .

Boy asked God, " Why she loves rose which dies in a day, but doesn't love me who dies for her everyday?"

God replied, "Mast hai!! Put it on Facebook!" :D

Adding some more..

1. Every hero rides their bike in super speed with the clutch engaged.
2. Every hero starts and rides past without opening the petrol on/reserve knob.
3. Whenever anybody speaks on the coin phone, they dont put another coin after 60 seconds to continue. They go on and on and on and on..

you can add the horrendous steering play that every car in hindi movies has!!!

Oops..not aware of it, since dont watch Bollywood movies.

Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.

After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said,

"Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat."

Little Johnny replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"

Little Johnny answered, "No, he minded his own business!" :D

Also add, whenever the hero/heroine realizes that the cars brakes have failed, he/she has to be on a ghat section and that too at the fastest possible speed!!!

************************************

Off FB (where else! Thats where all the jokes are nowadays!)

I ran into my ex the other day! Just to be sure, engaged Reverse and ran into her again and again!

Couple of more from side.

Santa applied in a medical college but never cleared it as these were his answers:
Antibody: one who hates his/her body!
Artery: Study of painting!
Bacteria: Back door of cafeteria!
Coma: punctuation mark!
Genes: Blue Denim!
Labor pain: hurt at work!
Ultrasound: Radical Sound!
Cardiology: advance study of playing cards!:Cheering:

___________________________________________

Boy was in a bus.
Suddenly driver applied
break.He fell on a girl &
kissed her.

Girl : Hey!What are you doing?

Boy: Engineering & you?

she smiled & said B.Sc

Moral:Always think about
studies first :D

and i used to think (when i was a kid) that one has to keep doing that while driving lol:

Little Johnny has apparently said this to someone else before.

You are hereby "Condored" :D:

http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/shifti...tml#post119259

Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border.

The Italian Customs Officer stops them and tells them "It'sa illegala to putta 5 people in a Quattro."

"Vot do you mean it's illegal?" asks the German driver.

"Quattro meansa four" replies the Italian official.

"Quattro is just ze name of zefokken automobile" the German says unbelievingly. "Look at ze dam papers: ze car is designed to karry 5 persons"

"You canta pulla thata one on me!" replies the Italian customs officer. "Quattro meansa four. You have five-a people ina your car and you are thereforea breaking the law."

The German driver replies angrily, "You idiot! Call your zupervisor over. I vant to speak to someone viz more intelligence!"

"Sorry" responds the Italian officer, "He can'ta come. He'sa busy witha 2 guys in a Fiat Uno.

:-) Cheers!!

Another one from facebook :)

"Newtons new law of motion......
Loose motion cannot be done in slow motion !!!! :D"

Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.


One day a friend asked," Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"


Fred replied, " Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mom doesn't like them."


His friend thought for a moment and said,"I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who is just like your mother."


A few months later they met again and his friend said, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"


With a frown on his face, Fred answered,"Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."


Then friend said,"Then, what's the problem?"


Fred replied," my father doesn't like her."

Thats some theory :-)

Lucky I came to office early today before everyone else. Am laughing my __ out.
:uncontrol:uncontrol